I have been absent from this blog for a while. My mom transitioned into a short-term hospice facility and I’ve been dividing my time between New Hampshire and Connecticut. I’m a little stretched thin these days.
I’m telling you this not for sympathy, (but I will take any and all support) but rather I’m letting you know that as writers, when you are going through a particularly painful time – that’s when you should be picking up your pens and writing. Some pretty honest and gut wrenching stuff will come out.
Everyone handles adversity and grief in their own way. For me, it’s writing about it.
Writers all know that writing is and always will be the best therapy. When I write, all of those jumbled thoughts of insanity in my head become clear. I can pull them out and create some semblance of sense. When I write I start to breathe.
I have not had the time to sit down much at my computer (when I’m in New Hampshire I teach and when I’m in Connecticut I’m with my mother) but I have been taking notes. At the end, I want to (need to) share with others what an incredible journey this has been. I want to explain what happens in hospice (I’ll tell you right now, I was a hospice virgin and didn’t have a clue.) I want people to know that although as a young woman I fought my mother and told her “I’m never going to be like you!” at the end, what I’m actually discovering is that I am indeed my mother’s daughter.
I want to let people know what a privilege it is to spend time with those who have limited time.
My mom is in a room with up to 3 other women who are all in different stages of their journeys. We all talk, we laugh – I bring bagels and coffee. And we mourn when yet another one leaves.
At the end there are no defenses left. You are stripped down to your essence and from that place empowerment, integrity and clarity emerges. And from that experience also can come powerful words.
It’s not time for me to fully write about this (I have been writing a little on my blog), but when it is, I’ll take out my notebook and will try my best to put into words what this incredible experience has meant and what lessons I have learned as I travel alongside my mother while she in on her final journey.
Wendy Thomas is an award winning journalist, columnist, and blogger who believes that taking challenges in life will always lead to goodness. She is the mother of 6 funny and creative kids and it is her goal to teach them through stories and lessons.
Wendy’s current project involves writing about her family’s experiences with chickens (yes, chickens). (www.simplethrift.wordpress.com) She writes about her chickens for GRIT, Backyard Poultry, Chicken Community, and Mother Earth News.